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05/24/2012

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Active listening.  Josep Caballe’-Domenech delivered his dress rehearsal message Saturday afternoon insisting that actively listening to every single part of the music is our most important charge.  No players buried in their music stands--he wanted awareness.  And it’s not just the individual musicians who must actively listen, the conductor also listens and responds to feedback.  Alan Gilbert, music director of the New York Philharmonic on conducting, “One of the ways to make your sound better is to make it really obvious that you’re really listening and that it really matters to you what it sounds like.” He goes on to say, “As soon as it’s apparent that your ears are open and that you’re interested and you’re following the contour of the sound, then that very contour is affected by that.”  

Caballe’-Domenech is a fiery conductor who demands our best.  In spite of the hard work, playing for him is a most rewarding orchestral experience.  To be tuned in to each note and every nuance is beyond compare.  It’s electrifying.  When playing in the zone your senses are heightened.  Constantly receiving feedback, musicians react with split-second precision.  And just like he said, the orchestra is not a stage full of individuals playing their part; it is one instrument responding as a single organism.  

In this scenario, musicians get feedback from their stand partners, section leaders, concertmaster, and conductor.  Rehearsals are full of verbal feedback; in performance feedback is exclusively non-verbal.  Musicians use their specific training to listen and respond to a huge number of variables--pitch, dynamics, articulation, style.  They take the notes of the page  and along with the interpreter, the conductor, and the information practiced and retained from rehearsals they work together to create a spontaneous musical experience.  At the end the audience delivers even more feedback by way of applause, cheering and maybe even standing to show appreciation.  By the time the performance is done, I know where I stand.  

What happens to a musician when they can’t rely on feedback?  Or their traditional notion of feedback is turned upside down?  I’m also a member of a new kind of orchestra-the Twtr Symphony.  Made up of musicians across the world recording remotely, it’s a whole new concept. “...While we approach performance in a very different way than other symphony orchestras, it is our extensive use of social media as a tool for connection which sets us apart." ~ Composer Chip Michael.  We met first through social media by tweeting our personal plans, projects and experiences.  Our feedback began as a supportive forum, then one by one we auditioned and became an orchestra.  

When I started I had more questions than confidence.  Alone in my studio with a piece of music and a click track, where was the feedback I wanted?  What I got instead was harsh.  The click track was a stern taskmaster.  The playback was cruel.  Neither were willing to bend--or lie.  I found myself delivering my finished recording with tentative words, “if you need me to re-record just let me know.”  With no stand partner to smile and no audience to clap I was looking for some kind of positive feedback, reassurance or a little pat on the back, hoping that my playing was good enough.  After I sent my recording I had even more questions.  How do I fit in the group?  What does the orchestra sound like?


Maybe I was getting the feedback I needed all along.  What happens when conventions are altered?  We adapt.  True I wasn’t getting “normal” feedback.  Instead of concentrating on what I wasn’t hearing I had to look and listen a little bit harder.  What was I really hearing?  Enthusiasm.  Excitement.  And lots and lots of support.  The Twtr Symphony is an orchestra that supports the group and supports each other.  Just like the conventional orchestra I mentioned above we are more than individuals recording separate parts--we are united through support, sharing and investment in the outcome.  That’s the amazing thing about social media--it really does connect us.  My questions were replaced with confidence and trust.  And I’m glad to be part of the adventure.

 
 
A friend posted this yesterday morning on Facebook and it's so perfect I just had to share.  This lovely lady is  one of the most positive people I've ever known which makes her call to action all the more fascinating.   I've spent years working on the lessons of change.  Most of the time I approach change with great reluctance and even resentment.  "Why am I always the one who has to change?"--that's my usual wail.  But this note got me thinking that making little changes in myself has a positive ripple effect that impacts my work, my environment and my relationships.  This is really all about forgiveness and that starts in my own heart.  I've committed to join Listen In and Think Positive!


Here's the post:
"Woke up this morning feeling like starting my own little grassroots movement for the month of March 2012. I invite you to join me to Listen In and Think Positive! for the entire month of March. Ever wonder how many thoughts floating around in your oh so active mind are positive? How many are negative? I invite you to join me this entire month in taking a second to take notice - to track those pesky little thoughts and to make a change - Listen In and Think Positive!

Is there a person in your life that whenever they walk towards you down the hall they just always ruffle your feathers? Stop and listen in - think about one thing about that person you appreciate and are grateful for, and smile:-) Feeling overwhelmed with your life? Stop and listen in - think about one thing about yourself that you are intensely grateful for, and smile:-) Is there a person close to you who is getting you down? Stop and listen in - think about one piece of information that person has shared with you that you are grateful for and possibly even treasure, and smile:-) Is the bus late again, or traffic at a standstill? Stop and listen in - look up, don't think, just look at the nature around you and share some gratitude for the intense beauty in the world, and smile:-) 

LIKE if you commit to joining Listen In and Think Positive! for the month of March 2012:-)"
Lovely, isn't it?  Pass it on!
 
 
Start the day with a good breakfast. Drink at least 8 glasses of water a day. Take the stairs instead of the elevator. And get a good night's sleep. For those of you who haven't clicked away from this page--just kidding. We already know about taking care in those basic ways. We figure out what works. We do what we think is important and filter the rest of the advice. I'd like to suggest a way to take care of yourself that involves something a little more subtle--the power of word choice.

In my original Coping Strategies post I briefly mentioned the difference between saying I need to or should do something and saying I want to do it. If everything on your task list is a should message or a have-to then nothing really feels like a choice. Yes, I know that I should get up early to get some chores done before I leave. If I say instead, that I want to get up to get a good start on the day then I've easily made a positive impact on my life. I allow myself to make positive choices.

The most powerful example of language was explained to me by a counselor several years ago. It has to do with the way we talk about our feelings. I have feelings yet I am not my feelings. I may feel sad. And sometimes I feel angry. But those feelings are not me. I retrained myself to avoid saying, "I am angry, or I am lonely." It's all in the power of the statement "I am."

Positive feelings are the ones I want to embody. So for those ideas I use "I am" statements. Yes, I am happy and I am courageous and maybe I am a bit sassy from time to time. I Take Care of myself by taking charge of the language that defines me.  It's all in the power of the words I choose.